i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
