You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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