Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Randomize
