don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
