Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize
