Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Randomize
