the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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