Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Randomize