i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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