I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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