just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
