I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
