i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
