too bad you live with your parents still
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
