honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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