She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
