let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
