I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
this is an emotional support booty call
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
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