Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
