Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
