Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize
