She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
