Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
