i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
you never un-have a 4some
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
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