Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
