He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
