An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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