I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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