You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
