Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
