The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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