When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
