Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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