I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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