maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Randomize
