Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
