dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Randomize