His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
My vagina is very pro this idea
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
