Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
