you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
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