I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
just come out here and I will go home with you...
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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