There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
