Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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