next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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