don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
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