this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
