Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
