i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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