You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Randomize
