Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
