she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
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